Confidence

   I admit, confidence is not something that I have a lot, and I don't understand why. But I bet so do you if you are reading this! Just look at it, we have everything that we ever need, and we have the ability to achieve everything that we would ever want! So I really don't get why we are struggling so much to speak up, to raise our head when walking and to do whatever we see right!

   Of course I have gained a little bit of confidence gradually over the years of collegge, and in my opinion middle school and high school where the worst. When you were in primary school, you did not care much about what others have to say to you, but when you step in the world of middle school, it is like the another world, where your classmates starts to judge you by the way you look, by clothes you wear. High school kids do pretty much the same, if not even worse. I still remember how I like a guy in my middle school, and being a moron as he was, he asked his friend if he should date me, and that another guy said something kind of 'look at her, she is the ugliest girl I have ever seen' kind of stuff. Everything was told to me by another classmates of mine, and I must say she was not a very good friend as well. Yes I was upset but of course never cried for stuff like that, but my confidence was ruined, and highschool when I was rejected by two other morons, situation could not get worse.

    But then I got to the collegge, not the best one but still was quiet popular and located abroad. And then I was started to rethink of those pathetic rejections. Most of the guys I liked back then could not even go to the lowest grade of college. They turned out quiet bad. And so did a lot of 'popular girls' from the past. And look at me, I have changed so much, I got an education that they have to dream about, I got prettier because I learned to take better care of myself, I have a much brighter future than most of them. Me and my mom have a theory that human are usually get more and more attractive over the time. And luckily for those who are considered to be popular in middle/high school, they developed fast, but at the same time unluckily for them, because of that fast speed, it just stops sometime at the middle, whereas others will continue to grow being more attractive. It is not that they have became less attractive or anything, it is just they can not have the personality or physical attractiness that is not for middle or highschool girls/boys. I am writing this only for the reason to help those out there who are struggling with what I was going through, not because I want to bash anyone and it is not likely that my older schoolmates can find this. But if somehow I recognize me, feel free to think whatever you want. 

    Reading my blog,  people may say that I have to spend much time and money on clothes and make up because I do not have enough confidence, but for me making myself most beautiful as possible is my hobby. And I dont feel ashamed about that. I bet others that are saying this stuff to me or to any of you are just jealous because they cannot do that for some reasons. Admit it, no one wants to look unpresentable. I am not saying that how people looks from outside is all it counts because over a period of time the truth will come out. That is why I am saying that you dont have to be the smartest or the nicest or the coolest kid to be attractive, you only need two things in order to be confident and happy with yourself which is 1. common sense and 2. personality. Common sense, although there is not exact definition for it, can help you to act appropriately in some situation or to help you to get out the situation at all if you are not even want to fit in. Common sense can tell you that those kids that are trying to impress people are just kids and will always stay that way, whereas you, you can choose your path and do things you like, not things that others want you to do. Personality is also important, and it is something that practically everyone has, some people are just showing it better than others. You can be a little bit crazy or mean, but if you are unique and you know that you are, naturally people will just love you for who you are!

   Wow, it turns out so much longer than I thought, and very confusing, but if you did not have enough patience to go through all the ramblings, here is two things that you need to remember: First, you may have your bad days, but trust me if you don't care about the whole negativity from people that think they are better than you, you are better than them. And second, it is the end that counts, you dont know how it will fold up in the future, you might end up much better than you could ever imagine so never stop believing and always have your head high with lots of confidence.

    Good luck to you all and follow me for future posts!!